However, this has to be fair for all sides.

Jörg Breitweg encourages parents to focus on their child’s strengths. "If a 16-year-old gets violent, he’ll have done it without slamming for 16 years" he points out. You can build on this and see what he needs to activate his strengths again. "You can always do something" emphasizes Breitweg.

Who can help?

If you notice that you are overwhelmed with the situation within the family, you should get professional support. Parents shouldn’t shy away from talking to the police either. "They are usually very interested in working with the parents of juvenile offenders" says Jörg Breitweg. Educational support is more likely to come from the youth welfare office, from an educational counseling center or from child and youth psychologists.

"It is normal for adolescents to feel the need to grapple – even physically" says Dieter Krowatschek. In order to get this urge under control, it is good if teenagers can really work off – for example while doing sports. "Here the young person can let off steam physically" explains the school psychologist from Marburg. Club work is often a way for young people to get out of their aggression. "A youth club, the voluntary fire brigade or the boy scouts, for example, are groups that provide distraction and steer the young person’s activity in a different direction." In addition, adolescents often find it easier to accept rules that are given to them by strange adults.

On "No" must always apply

However, it is also important that parents and educators take a close look at elementary school children and recognize aggressive behavior. "You can have a lot more influence here" says Krowatschek. As early as in kindergarten, children should be taught how to settle a dispute, the expert demands. Rules for occasional scuffles are also important: "The children should internalize that they must not go on the face or private parts of the opponent in a fight and that if the other gives up, one should stop" says Krowatschek. On "No" must always apply.

Oh no, not again! Malte actually just wants to have some peace and quiet and meet up with friends – but then his younger brother Anton comes along and wants to play with Malte. But he doesn’t feel like doing it at all and hisses at Anton. The dispute escalates and ends with slamming doors and tears. This is not an isolated case. The 16-year-old Malte from Berlin has been frustrated for a long time: "Small siblings are annoying" he finds.

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Anger is normal

"Anger is totally understandable in such situations, after all, it’s really annoying when younger siblings are around you all the time" says the psychologist Elisabeth Raffauf from Cologne.

The little ones don’t want to be annoying

But one should know: the smaller ones don’t want to annoy, they are interested in the big ones. For example, when they ask if they can come to the meeting with the friends of the older siblings in the afternoon, they want to know what the older ones are doing and discuss them. "What is normal for young people is very exciting for smaller children" explains Raffauf. "They want to belong and admire their older siblings for a lot of what they do."

One is that "King"

The attachment of the little ones is therefore not a conscious nagging, but rather an expression of interest and admiration. "That’s actually the nice thing about smaller siblings: In their eyes, you’re often the king" added the qualified psychologist Ulrich Gerth, chairman of the federal conference for educational counseling in Fürth. "And that’s why you can enjoy the fact that someone is fighting to be with you."

Make small concessions

Nevertheless, you don’t always have to have your younger siblings with you. "You should talk to her calmly and find a compromise" advises Raffauf. It is important not to completely exclude the sister or brother. "The little one is more likely to leave you alone if he or she does too "on" is." One could suggest to the younger generation: "You can now stay with my friends and me for ten minutes, but then you go and leave us alone" or "Please go now, but I promise I’ll tell you afterwards what we did".

Parents have to help

Finding compromises is not always easy. Therefore, sometimes the parents will have to help. "This should also be discussed calmly so that the parents have time to deal with their own worries" says Raffauf. "It is also good if you can make a suggestion straight away that you can discuss with your parents." Parents can also help to establish clear rules and enforce them.

Fair for both sides

However, this has to be fair for all sides. "It happens again and again that parents prefer a child or instruct the elderly to regularly supervise the younger ones" says Gerth. "Then the young people should clearly express their own wishes to the parents and agree on fixed rules." If that doesn’t work, it can be useful to get help. "Other relatives or youth counseling centers can be good contacts."

Siblings can be a support

Small siblings can also be a support. Especially when there are conflicts with the parents, it helps to be able to alliance with them, says the qualified psychologist Elisabeth Raffauf. Together we are stronger. The little ones can also help in other situations. "Younger children often do not have as many inhibitions and are more adventurous – many older siblings are therefore happy to be able to send the little ones to strangers so that they break the ice."

A new chapter in life begins for children when they start school. There is no question that this sentence is true. However, it is often forgotten that the new section does not only refer to the daily dose of education. Because school enrollment also means for the children that they are now – often for the first time – exposed to the dangers of road traffic every day. It is therefore important to prepare the beginning of this period intensively and competently. However, it is not advisable to drive the children to school every day in order hot japaneese teen to avoid possible dangers. In fact, that is precisely what applies "Parents taxi" as a wrong and even dangerous way.

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From "Parents taxi" is not advisable

In front of many schools it is now a common sight: When school starts, there is a real bustle of traffic on the streets in the area. Cars stop in front of the entrance to let the children out of the supposed safety of the car and onto the school grounds, which are also believed to be safe. "The parents’ taxi is not advisable" says Hannelore Herlan, spokeswoman for the German Traffic Watch (DVW) in Berlin. There are a number of reasons for this: On the one hand, the children have to find their way around in traffic in their further lives anyway. So it is better to get them used to it in time. In addition, car transport is often stressful, the children are not adequately secured, and the journey itself is hectic.

Familiarize the children with the rules of road traffic

Hannelore Herlan can use figures to show that children are anything but safe in the car: According to this, about 33 percent of children between the ages of six and ten have accidents as pedestrians and 26 percent as cyclists. At the top, however, are accidents with cars – 37 percent of the children involved in accidents are injured as passengers in a car. Experts therefore advise you to refrain from using the "Parents taxis" to take for the way to school. It is better to familiarize the children with what happens in traffic and to teach them the rules and the correct procedure.

Parents should be role models

This should not be started in the last few seconds, says Klaus Brandenstein, spokesman for accident research for insurers in Berlin: "Traffic education doesn’t start on a specific date. As a rule, parents can do the most to ensure the safety of their children if they set a good example themselves." An example of this is that children learn from their parents’ behavior at an early age not to cross the street when it is red and to look left and right before crossing the lane.

The way to school under "Real conditions" to practice

In principle, experts like Sven Rademacher from the German Road Safety Council (DVR) in Bonn recommend: "Parents should practice going to school with their children before they start school." It should also be noted that the shortest route is not always the safest. If the short distance includes crossing a multi-lane main road, it may be advisable to choose a different route with the child. It is important to find the way under "Real conditions" to practice. So it should not be done in the evening, when there is hardly any traffic, but in the morning, when the traffic is on the way that the child has to deal with on the way to school. During these exercises, the aim is to teach where the road can best be crossed and what to look out for.

Few intersections and blind spots

Adults should also take on the role of children: If dad and mum can look over the roofs of parked cars without any problems, the bodies represent dangerous visual obstacles for the little ones. Basically, the path should have as few crossings and blind spots as possible.

Make spot checks

Sven Rademacher recommends starting training on the way to school around two to three weeks before starting school. "If you start too early, it can also be counterproductive." If there is a long break between the training phase and everyday school life, the child may have forgotten a lot. After starting school, parents should accompany their children for a while on the way – and later also make random checks to see whether the practiced behavior is still being maintained. If that is the case, then the new phase of life should have significantly fewer dangers.

Children lead their parents

To practice the way to school, the offspring should also lead their parents once – and not the other way around. The child practically brings the parents to school and explains how they should behave at traffic lights or zebra crossings, for example. The Federal Center for Health Education (BZgA) in Cologne advises this game.

Proper school bags for optimal visibility

The right school satchel is also important for road safety, because the children can only be seen by drivers with the right satchel. According to the DIN 58124 satchel standard, the front and side parts of the satchel must have both retroreflective and fluorescent materials, i.e. on the one hand elements that reflect the light from the headlights in the dark and on the other hand those that light up during the day and at dusk (fluoresce). These areas can be orange or yellow and must have a high perceptible luminosity, because this is the only way that drivers can see school children from a relatively large distance.

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